


I'll stay with you the way I am

by jazzaiko



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Action, Afterlife, Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Alternate Universe - Noragami Fusion, Alternate Universe - Spirits, Ayakashi, Fantasy, Fluff, Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Platonic Relationships, Shapeshifter, Shinki (Noragami), Spirits, Supernatural Elements, monster fighting, some violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:47:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27415231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jazzaiko/pseuds/jazzaiko
Summary: This is the story of a god and his shinki
Relationships: Kim Jongdae | Chen/Kim Junmyeon | Suho
Comments: 12
Kudos: 38
Collections: EXO MONSTERFEST 2020





	I'll stay with you the way I am

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Yolowsher](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yolowsher/gifts).



> Self-prompt
> 
> This is an AU based on Noragami, a Japanese manga and anime series.  
> I tried making it beginner-friendly so no prior knowledge of the anime is required.
> 
> Please note that the characters in this fic are not living humans, they are gods and spirits. Also, the age in this fic is not the same as canon (gods live longer than spirits so they are much older).
> 
> -
> 
> Warning for potentially triggering contents: past character death, some violence, rather graphic description of ayakashi, a brief mention of a car accident, homophobia, and bullying 
> 
> -
> 
> The title is taken from Baekhyun's Every Second. 
> 
> Thank you so much my dear friends for the support and for the mod for allowing me so many extensions. 
> 
> Please enjoy~  
> 

At the moment, there are 7,800,000,000 humans on this earth, each with their stories and struggles, wishes, and needs. Despite having modern technology that can do various things to assist their lives, many humans still believe and worship gods. 

There are different gods for various purposes, constantly reincarnating to hear – and sometimes grant – human wishes, whether it’s a wish for peace and fortune, or war and calamity. There are seven that stand out the most among all, seven that receive most of the prayers and pleas. One of them is Daikokuten, the god of wealth and trade. Junmyeon may not be the first incarnation of Daikokuten, but he is the current one. 

Humans think that being a god is nice. Being known and worshipped by mortals, having all the power to do whatever you wish whether it is for success or wealth…everything seems nice, right? But Junmyeon begs to differ, being a god isn’t a bed of roses. 

They say with great power comes great responsibility. And it's true even for a god of wealth like Junmyeon. Some of his responsibilities as a god are to slay ayakashi and bring prosperity to the humans. 

Ayakashi are evil corrupted spirits and can come in any creepy forms from minuscule to gigantic, although not visible to human eyes. While gods fulfill wishes and bring humanity to better shape, ayakashi ruins and brings humanity to depravity, causing them to suffer. Vicious and highly manipulative, usually ayakashi latches onto humans, whispering negative and toxic thoughts. They toy with human feelings, inducing hatred, influencing humans to commit sins and terrible acts – from seemingly small things like lying and stealing, to more extreme things like taking their own lives or others’. 

In times of difficulty, humans tend to be more unstable and desperate, causing more negativity and ayakashi to form. Currently, there is a pandemic outbreak, slowing and weakening the economy. Humans are losing lives, jobs, and hopes. The gods are needed more than ever. 

And this is where gods like Junmyeon comes in. Junmyeon has received a wish from a bank owner and its employees to save them from bankruptcy so here he is, balancing himself on the top of a building, the ominous strong wind blowing the tail of his coat. Some distance across him, an ayakashi is perching on top of the bank building in the form of a ghostly, monstrous giant purple toad, staring viciously at the god with its multiple red glowing eyes. 

This ayakashi is one of the many that Junmyeon encounters. He has been going here and there, repelling ayakashi that interrupts the flow of wealth and blessing houses and buildings. Considering the massive influx of ayakashi appearance, the whole thing has been stressing him out, but he isn’t fighting alone. 

“Minseok, are you ready?” 

Minseok, who has been standing beside him, grins in excitement. “As ready as you are, hyung.” 

Junmyeon is ready too. _“Come, Xiumin!”_ Minseok is engulfed in white light, transforming into an iron war fan in Junmyeon’s hand. 

The giant toad ayakashi notices their presence and jumps towards them, but Junmyeon is ready in position with the fan open in his hand. With one swing of the fan, he sends a wave of a powerful force, pushing the ayakashi back. Before it gets any chance to attack back, Junmyeon has already leaped in the air with the fan closed in his hand, jabbing and striking the ayakashi’s body. The ayakashi growls in irritation and pain. 

Junmyeon starts his incantation, “ _In the land of abundance, there is no place for your defilement. I, Daikokuten, will destroy all evildoers and bad karma with my Xiumin–_ ” As Junmyeon chants, he strokes across the war fan, blessing it, which then glows white under his touch. Junmyeon lands a few more critical hits on the toad ayakashi before he says the final line, “ _– Be gone._ ”

The giant toad explodes and bursts into tiny particles. A specific rune appears in place of the ayakashi, then disappears completely, signifying that it has been completely killed and banished from the human world. 

One wish has been fulfilled. May the situation in this bank and its employees go uphill after this. Junmyeon lands on the rooftop and exhales in relief. “ _Return to form, Minseok.”_

The iron war fan in his hand glows white and floats in the air before shifting back into his human form. Minseok gives a polite little nod as a sign of respect before speaking with a gummy smile on his face. “You are awesome today too, hyung.”

“Ah, you are the awesome one for helping me, Minseok,” Junmyeon smiles in return, always thankful. The sun is setting in the background, the timing is just nice for them to wrap things up. “Home, home, let’s go home.” 

They make their way to the Daikokuten shrine. Junmyeon can use his godly power to teleport immediately back home, but he enjoys observing how humans flock around, going home after school or work, unaware of supernatural beings among them. Well, with Junmyeon wearing his three-piece suit and walking alongside Minseok in a white long-sleeved shirt and slacks, the two of them appear just like any regular humans, blending in the crowd. 

However, something makes Junmyeon stop in his tracks. He senses a spirit, hidden amidst the crowd. A soul of a young male, most likely in his teens in human age, screaming to live. As Junmyeon continues to listen, the spirit is like a lost kitten looking for its mother. The desperation in his soul calls to Junmyeon, his heart aches with every cry. No one should be left alone like this.

Junmyeon has made his decision.

“Are you going to take him?” 

“Of course, Minseok,” Junmyeon answers, eyes flitting back to the floating spirit. “Can’t you hear how desperate he is? Poor thing. He must have been wandering alone for a long time.”

"You're always so kind, hyung." Minseok shoots Junmyeon that look of ‘even if I say anything, that wouldn’t change your decision, right’ and Junmyeon can’t help but grin at his most trusted shinki. Minseok knows Junmyeon very well, as expected from one of the shinki that has been with him for a very long time. 

Junmyeon carefully approaches, keeping his voice gentle and sweet to not scare the spirit away. "Hello there, little spirit. People usually call me Daikokuten, but you can just call me Junmyeon."

The spirit seems to be in a daze then panics, most likely shocked and in disbelief that a god just talked to him. It is the usual occasion whenever someone encounters a god. Although it happens several times before, Junmyeon finds it amusing. "I can see that you are very excited, little spirit. Can I have your permission?" 

“What permission?” Junmyeon can hear the spirit reply in his tiny voice. 

"Do you want to come with me? You don’t need to be alone anymore."

“Of course!! I want it.” The tone and desperation in his voice tell Junmyeon that it is all he has been wishing for, there is nothing else he wants more.

The spirit’s enthusiasm is very infectious, Junmyeon can feel it warming his heart and chuckles. "Alright, alright. I know you are eager, but calm down." 

"First things first, you will need a name."

To take in a wandering spirit as part of his family, Junmyeon has to do the naming ritual to turn the wandering human spirit into a shinki – a divine instrument. It can come in any form: from mundane everyday things to weapons, accessories, clothes, armors, even in some cases, animals. Gods deem those spirits deserving of a second chance since they still want to live. 

The naming ritual is something that Junmyeon has done many times before but hasn’t done for a while. He takes a step back and raises his hand high. As the ritual begins, hanja characters emerge and float in the air, so many of them, surrounding the two of them like golden walls. The tip of Junmyeon's pointer finger shines white as he moves his hand. 

“ _You, with nowhere to go and nowhere to return to, I grant you a place to belong. My name is Daikokuten. I will give you a name, and you shall become my servant._ ” 

At this point, Junmyeon has finished writing in the air, the characters glow pure white. He is giving two names, one for the human form and one for the vessel form. The spirit’s voice is clear and bright, like a bell, so Junmyeon decided on Jongdae as his human name and Chen as his vessel form name.

 _"With this name and its alternate, I use my life to make thee a shinki! Thou art Jongdae! As a shinki, Chen! Come, Chen!”_

The moment he names the spirit to be his shinki, Junmyeon can see the spirit's previous life. Various images from Jongdae’s past appear in his mind. Junmyeon sees a younger Jongdae with his brother and parents smiling, warm and loving. Then it changes to Jongdae in school, studying, having fun with his friends. Jongdae entered college and met his love. But people around him couldn’t accept their relationship, because it was not the norm. Friends turned to foes, care turned to hate. Rumors spread like wildfire, and he often received hate messages. However, other flashes showed that Jongdae still smiled and was helpful to others. The last scene Junmyeon saw was Jongdae trying to save his love from an oncoming car, only to meet his demise. 

Humans are mortal and vulnerable creatures but can be so evil towards one another. Junmyeon knows this very well, he has seen it many times, but it doesn't stop his eyes from brimming with tears and his heart from aching. This boy never meant any harm and just wanted to help, yet his life was cut short because of it. 

At least, their paths crossed with each other. Now, Jongdae doesn't need to suffer anymore. 

Minseok eyes him curiously. Junmyeon knows what is in his mind, his shinki is eager to know what caused the god to break into tears out of nowhere and wipe his eyes. However, the spirit's past is a god's greatest secret, no one should know, especially the spirit himself. Knowing their past and how they died will cause the spirit to be consumed with regrets, resentment, and even revenge, transforming them into karma ayakashi which is worse than the usual ayakashi. At this point, they will be too far gone beyond saving since karma ayakashi can’t be purified even by god’s power.

Once the naming ritual is complete, it always ends with the spirit materializing in their god owner's hand. When Junmyeon glances at his palm, he finds a pipe-like object. It's plain, bronze in color. A light stroke over the surface tells Junmyeon that it is made from bamboo. At first, he thinks it's a stick because it's quite long, but upon further inspection, he finds the object is hollow on both ends. 

“A pipe?" Minseok chimes in, studying the object with keen eyes.

"I'm not sure. What is this?” Junmyeon tries checking again, tilting the object, trying to peer inside the hole. 

Nothing.

"Is that an instrument?" Minseok offers. 

The shape and length of the object do remind Junmyeon of a flute, however, he isn't sure. "Quite unlikely though, because my domain isn’t about arts." 

Minseok scratches his chin, deep in thought. It’s cute. Junmyeon appreciates how much effort he put in to help. "Anyway, let's just go back and figure it out later." 

“Right.”

  
  


⭐

  
  


Darkness.

Loneliness.

Every day was the same. Wandering. Floating. With no direction, all by himself. Whether he was still alive or not, he didn’t know. But he did know whenever he approached someone, no one seemed to be able to see him, let alone interact with him.

Every day, he wished for the same thing. To be seen. To be alive again, not as this formless spirit. To not be alone anymore. 

Every day, he wondered if there is someone out there who can help him. Angels, gods, wish-granter… anyone? He had visited churches and temples. He even tried a wishing well but he couldn’t throw a coin inside, floating around and inside the well didn’t help.

With every passing day, he started to lose hope…Until that fateful day when a beautiful god visited him. Naming him, taking him under his wing. 

Everything turned white after. No more darkness. Only warmth. 

  
  
  


When he blinks his eyes open, Jongdae finds himself in front of the gorgeous-looking god, Junmyeon, from earlier. The god’s expression lights up with relief, happy to see Jongdae. Jongdae can’t help but wonder – how can someone be so handsome and stunning? His appearance is like a charming prince. His skin fair as snow, his dark black hair swept in a tasteful wave, his features perfect, also those gold-rimmed glasses on his nose adding to the overall elegance...

A sudden night breeze catches him off guard. Usually the cold never bothered him regardless of the season, but now he can feel it, instinctively shivering and curling inwards. It’s strange. Only then Jongdae realized that he has a body. A physical, warm, filled-with-flesh body. Jongdae stares at the hands in front of him, fascinated by the five fingers, the skin, the palm – the hands he used to only see on someone else but not his own. When he peeks down, he can see a pair of tiny feet – his own feet, and the rest of his body wrapped in a white kimono. On top of his head, he can feel strands of soft hair under his touch. 

Is he…alive? 

Jongdae is still in a state of confusion, but then Junmyeon’s chuckle diverts Jongdae’s attention from his body to the god. “It’s strange, isn’t it?” he calls out. Junmyeon’s expression is gentle as he explains. “Don’t worry. Since I have made you into my shinki – divine instrument, now you have a physical body.” 

Jongdae only nods, not sure of what to say without offending the god. He tries to stand still, but the chill from the night breeze doesn’t leave him. The god notices him shivering and his discomfort. “Oh dear, are you cold?” 

Jongdae nods again shyly, keeping his head bowed when Junmyeon approaches since he doesn’t know what to do. To his surprise, Junmyeon takes off his outer coat and drapes it over Jongdae’s shoulders. The warmth spreads all over his body, making Jongdae sigh in relief. There is also a pleasant scent from the coat, something akin to flowers and nice things, helping him to relax. 

A few seconds later, it just hits him that a god just gave him a coat. Junmyeon is a god and Jongdae is just an unknown, measly spirit – it’s so overwhelming and Jongdae is feeling a little god-struck. Squeezing the coat and pulling it closer to his body, Jongdae croaks, "T-thank you, God.” Even his attempt to thank the god comes out stuttered. Gosh, he feels pathetic. 

Junmyeon tuts. "No. Don't call me that."

How does someone call a god without using the word god? Jongdae racks his brain, then tries his next guess, "Then, lord?"

"No Lord either. I don't own the magic ring that can make you vanish."

He doesn’t want to be called “lord” because he is not the Lord of the Ring, huh. Jongdae huffs at the god's dry attempt at humor. "Uh, alright then, sir."

“No calling me sir! I'm no Sir Lancelot or Sir Bedivere, I'm not a knight!” Junmyone faux frowns and Jongdae frowns too – what to call this god? 

The god seems to sense his distress and grins to ease the shinki. “Just call me hyung. Don't be too formal with me either. You are part of our family now.”

"O-okay, h-hyung." It’s strange to call such an almighty god with something so casual and close. However, when Jongdae says the magic word “hyung”, Junmyeon's smile blooms beautifully, Jongdae wants to see it again and again.

"Good boy.” Junmyeon reaches out and pats Jongdae’s head. For some reason, the gesture makes Jongdae’s insides swell with warmth and pride. He likes it. 

Other than Jongdae, there is another shinki, a male in his mid-twenties with reddish-brown spiked-up hair and cat-like eyes, who introduces himself as Minseok. Junmyeon leads Jongdae and Minseok down the empty road towards a familiar construction with dark-colored roofs that have pointed edges and curved in the center which Jongdae recognizes as Daikokuten shrine. Once they step inside the shrine gate, their surroundings change from the dull night outside the shrine to inside a gate of a manor estate.

“Jongdae, welcome to your new home. This is The Mansion of Prosperity." 

Jongdae's mouth gapes open while staring at the place they are walking into. It is the biggest mansion he has ever seen – built in Victorian style, the exterior is painted white with carved ornaments, swirls, and golden accents. It is very aesthetically pleasing, a residence befitting the god of wealth. Jongdae is aware he is embarrassing himself but he can’t stop swooning when he walks past the towering double doors. Another exclamation of ooh-aah escapes his mouth when he sees beautiful paintings on his left and right, with fancy things displayed in the mansion as he follows Junmyeon and Minseok. 

A young man with fair skin and golden blonde hair greets them inside the main atrium. He takes a bow towards Junmyeon then hugs him. “Hyung! Welcome back.” 

Jongdae watches with a gasp, how can a spirit casually approach and threw himself at a god like that? Junmyeon is a god, he is a whole different league above them. But then he remembers that Junmyeon asked him to call him "hyung", so he guesses the god doesn't mind the close interaction after all. 

“Yixing, thank you,” Junmyeon greets back. “Oh, by the way, we have a newcomer, Jongdae. Please show him around and help his initiation.” Junmyeon steps aside, letting Yixing see their newest family member.

The moment Yixing’s gaze falls on Jongdae, his sleepy-looking yet kind eyes turn into crescents, complete with two dimples decorating his cheeks. His smile is sweet, making Jongdae automatically respond the same way. "Hello, you must be Jongdae. I'm Yixing, one of Junmyeon-hyung's shinki. Come with me." 

Once again, Jongdae feels warmth creeping up his cheeks. Are all shinki and gods so beautiful? Not trusting his mouth, Jongdae nods and quietly follows this Yixing guy. 

He notices that Yixing wears a white long-sleeved shirt with a ribbon tie around his neck and a grey vest paired with black slacks, just like Minseok and other shinki he saw earlier at the gate of the mansion. Soon Jongdae is handed the same set of clothes. This is probably their uniform. 

"You must feel cold. Go change first." 

Yixing directs him to a changing room, which is wide and warmly lit with corner lamps, its beige paint adding a lavish feel to it. One of the walls has a full-length mirror decorated with carvings. In the reflection, Jongdae gets a glimpse of himself for the first time - a young man with a rather wide shoulder and a lithe frame. His face is small and youthful with prominent cheekbones, brown locks falling over his eyebrows giving him a soft appearance. Jongdae doesn't remember how he looked when he was alive, but he feels very alive right now. 

When Jongdae slides the kimono off his body to change, he notices hanja characters 鐘大 written with red ink on his left chest, a little bit under the mole on his collarbone. He gives the characters a fond stroke. This is not just a normal tattoo. It's his name, his identity, that Junmyeon gave to him.

Once he puts the uniform on and checks himself in the mirror, Jongdae feels great. The shirt and vest hug his small frame and accentuate his small waist, the fitting slacks highlight his nice ass and thighs without being uncomfortable. The uniform gives him a sense of belonging, an affirmation that he is now officially a shinki that belongs to Daikokuten, the God of Wealth. 

A few knocks on the door can be heard before Yixing's voice calls him, "Jongdae, are you done changing? Let me show you around."

"Ah, yes." 

As expected from the god of wealth, Junmyeon's residence is extravagant and huge. Not just huge but HUGE. Jongdae can't remember anything from his previous life, but he is sure he had never seen anything like this before. The many rooms, the long corridors, the elegant decorations, the chandeliers hanging on the ceiling, paintings on the walls, also the expensive-looking displays like dragon vases and statues are magnificent. Jongdae’s mouth gapes in a constant "o" shape as Yixing brings him around. 

Since Jongdae is too busy admiring one painting on the wall, he doesn't realize a pole nearby and he directly walks into it. Ouch. Jongdae groans, his shoulder throbs. 

Yixing quickly checks on Jongdae, examining him for any injuries. "Are you hurt?" 

"Ah, no, I'm okay." Jongdae smiles sheepishly and shakes his head. He is about to let it go but a thought suddenly passes in his mind. "So, are we alive? Right now? Because it does feel a bit, uh, shocking when I bumped into the pole. I can feel it." 

Yixing explains, “Um, I won't say that we are alive. As shinki, we have a physical body now. However, we are still beings from the Far Shore.”

“Far Shore? What is that?”

“Far Shore is what we call the world of the non-living – gods, shinki, ayakashi. You can say it’s kinda like heaven or the afterlife. In contrast, The Near Shore is the world of the living – humans. Most of them can’t sense or see beings from the Far Shore like us.” 

Jongdae nods, still trying to grasp and make sense of his existence. Yixing continues showing him the different rooms and introducing him to other shinki when they meet. Jongdae grins and excitedly greets the others. 

“Do all gods have many shinki?” Jongdae asks. He met so many shinki in the mansion that he already started to forget some names. 

Yixing stops in his tracks and shifts his attention towards Jongdae. “It depends. Some gods only have a few shinki. But Junmyeon hyung is very kind. He usually takes in any spirits he meets, that’s why you see so many shinki in our household.” 

"I see." 

After touring the mansion, Yixing explains the things Jongdae is expected to do as a shinki. “We are bound to our god Junmyeon hyung. He will take care of us and our necessities. He will also bear the burden of all the emotions the shinki has, including the sins they commit. So, lesson number one: don’t hurt him. Be good. Keep your emotions in check, try not to feel things too strongly. Try to not dwell in negative emotions. Because he can feel them all."

Jongdae nods and keeps a mental note, but can't help wondering. "What will happen if someone disobeys and commits sins?" 

"Hyung will feel pain in the back of his neck. That area will also become infected by impurities called blight. If the shinki continues to sin and not reprimanded, the blight will spread all over the body, causing the god to slowly degrade and die."

Jongdae shudders at the thought. He will not do that. Junmyeon saved him and gave him a second life, he would do anything to repay his kindness. 

"Is there anything else I need to know?"

"Let me think," Yixing rubs his chin, pondering. "Ah, since we belong to Junmyeon hyung, we shouldn't bow to other gods. It's disrespectful.” 

“Okay,” Jongdae notes.

“And be ready to be called at all times when Junmyeon hyung is home. He might call for you and bring you along. Just don’t panic if he does use you. He may be eccentric at times but follow what he wants.” Yixing explains. “I think that’s all.” 

And so, Jongdae’s new life as a shinki begins. 

  
  


⭐

  
  


Living again feels like a dream. It is just the first day after he became a shinki, but Jongdae’s wishes are getting fulfilled one by one. He is not alone anymore. Now, he has people who talk to him and greet him as he explores the mansion. He has new friends among Junmyeon’s many shinki like Yixing, Minseok, and Yeri. They are warm and welcoming, making Jongdae feel right at home. 

It is around the evening when Jongdae notices a glow on the gate. He stands in awe as few people arrive at the gate – Junmyeon, Minseok, and a female shinki he still struggles to remember the name of. The three of them appear confident and sure of themselves, especially Junmyeon. He is very charismatic and radiates so much power, making Jongdae's thoughts empty, he can't think of anything else. 

"G-god Junmyeon, welcome back," Jongdae stutters, and he internally curses. Didn't Junmyeon ask him not to call him that?

The god laughs. "No calling me god, remember? Call me hyung." 

Jongdae's cheeks burn in shame as he tries again, "H-hyung, welcome back."

"That's my boy," Junmyeon coos, running his fingers through Jongdae's hair, giving him gentle pats. Although their heights aren’t that much different, Jongdae feels small and secure around Junmyeon. He leans into the touch, liking the affection. 

"Let's go get dinner."

The dining room is spacious, with many round dining tables. By the time they arrive, almost all seats are occupied with shinki eating and chatting with their friend circles. Not knowing where to sit, Jongdae silently follows Minseok, before the older shinki directs him to the table. There are so many varieties of food, they all eat merrily and Jongdae feels his stomach about to burst by the end of dinner. 

He can't sleep like this, so Jongdae walks through the corridor, wandering aimlessly until he reaches a terrace facing a boundless garden filled with a variety of flowers and trees. The view oversees the mountain and the forest, lit by the moon and hundreds of stars in the sky. It's beautiful and serene, only filled with the splash of water from the fountain and occasional cricket sounds in the air. 

As he treads between the maze of flowers and plants, Jongdae notices a beautiful white gazebo in the middle of the garden. He approaches, hoping to just find someplace to sit and enjoy the peace of the night. Apparently, he is not alone. Junmyeon is inside there sitting on the bench with a glass of wine nursed in his hand. The god notices him, and calls, "Oh Jongdae. Come here, don't be shy." 

Shyly, Jongdae comes over in tiny steps and takes a seat on the other end of the bench. However the god gestures to him to scoot closer, so Jongdae does. He is not sure what to do, so he just keeps his hands clasped on his lap. The night is peaceful yet his heart is thumping so fast, Jongdae is worried the god will hear it. 

Junmyeon elegantly takes a sip from his glass and turns to face Jongdae. "So Jongdae, how’s your first day?" 

Gosh, his face is so fair and so beautiful, how can someone be this flawless?

Jongdae fidgets as he answers, “It's great, my lord –”. 

“Hyung,” Junmyeon corrects.

The sudden correction catches Jongdae off guard, making heat creep up his cheeks. “Oh, yeah, hyung,” Jongdae tries to laugh it off to mask his embarrassment, and to his relief, Junmyeon doesn’t look angry. He continues, “Everyone here is so warm and kind, but I still can't remember some of their names." 

Junmyeon's laugh sounds like music in his ears. "Don't worry if you for-get now, you have for-ever to remember them all." 

The little joke makes him smile. But then it is followed by another silence. Jongdae is eager to break it but isn't sure what to ask. The whole ordeal is still unfamiliar to him, there are many questions swimming in his mind waiting to be said. 

The god seems to sense his worry. Maybe what Yixing explained about gods being attuned to shinki’s emotions is right. "What is it, Jongdae? You can ask me anything, you know?" Junmyeon’s voice is reassuring, lessening tension and worry in Jongdae’s heart. 

Jongdae braves himself to ask, “I’m still confused about this whole god and shinki thing. I’m not sure where to start.” 

"Don't worry, just blurt out the first thing in your mind."

"What is it that you do, go-h-hyung?” 

Junmyeon seems amused. “Woah, you have a big question right off the bat.” He chuckles, shifting his position to make himself more comfortable, then he looks at Jongdae with kind eyes and explains – about gods, about shinki. About his battles against ayakashi, how he braved through many financial crises. Jongdae doesn’t know how long they have sat there, but Junmyeon is very patient, answering all the questions Jongdae has but too shy to ask Yixing. With them sitting next to each other, Jongdae can whiff a soft yet fragrant aroma, the same one he smelled from the coat Junmyeon lent last night. It’s so comfortable and close, crumbling the wall of hesitation Jongdae initially feels towards the god. Junmyeon’s explanation goes on and on, lulling him...maybe he will close his eyes for a moment...

When Jongdae opens his eyes, he wakes up to the view of the garden and the sound of birds chirping. The night sky has changed to a brighter shade of blue with the sun peeking by that time. The next thing he notices is Junmyeon’s fragrant scent in the air and the soft silky fabric pressed against his cheek. Jongdae jumps in shock when realizing that he has been leaning on the god’s shoulder, with the god's arm around his shoulder and hand patting Jongdae's hair. To have a god, someone so grande and far out of reach, this close…not going to lie, Jongdae’s heart skips a beat.

Junmyeon stirs, his eyebrows twitching as he blinks his eyes open, looking a little disoriented and sleepy. A pang of guilt hits Jongdae, he feels bad for keeping Junmyeon up all night. “Go-h-hyung, I’m sorry for falling asleep. Did you m-manage to rest?” 

But the god doesn’t seem to mind. “It's alright, Jongdae. Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed. How about you, did you have a good rest?” 

The joke was kind of off. But when a soft smile blooms on Junmyeon's face, it's so beautiful, Jongdae finds himself blushing again. "Yes, h-hyung." 

The god continues to surprise him. Junmyeon shows him the library, his collections of books, music records, and films. He also gives Jongdae permission to watch and enjoy them. Jongdae is giddy because he loves music and films. Jongdae wonders how the god owns so many things – but well, Junmyeon is a god of wealth, he is filthy rich. Being immortal means he has all the time in the world to enjoy the books and other things he collected. 

Despite being a god, and a god of wealth on top of that, Junmyeon is never stingy nor snobbish. In contrast, he is very generous and kind. He treats everyone well, making sure his many shinki are well taken care of and have their needs met. Jongdae has never asked for anything, but he has seen some shinki wanting something from the Near Shore. When Junmyeon leaves the mansion for his work, he comes back with the item the shinki wishes. He is very kind and doting like that, making Jongdae admire Junmyeon more. In Jongdae's heart, he swears his loyalty to Junmyeon and only him. 

Jongdae wishes he can express his gratefulness to the god himself. But he often ends up stuttering in front of Junmyeon, for the god’s presence overwhelms him, so he decides to show it through his actions. If Junmyeon seems tired, he offers to give him massages, which the god accepts happily. When he eventually can speak more eloquently, Jongdae reminds Junmyeon to eat and encourages him. And he is always rewarded by Junmyeon’s smile which gives him butterflies and happiness.

However, there is a growing concern in his heart. Ever since Jongdae became Junmyeon’s shinki, the god never calls Jongdae to bring him out. He wonders why, but he can’t bring himself to ask. He is just a measly spirit, one shinki out of the many Junmyeon owns. Who is he to demand things from such a mighty god? He is not sure he's that worthy.

Besides, Junmyeon is busy. Maybe, one day Junmyeon will call for him.

  
  


⭐

  
  


As a shinki, though, Jongdae continues to learn things. Today, Yixing is teaching him a new skill.

“Here, you put your index and middle finger close together,” Yixing instructs, guiding Jongdae’s hand into position. Then he steps back and sets his hand in the same position. “And then you draw a horizontal line in front of you, like this.” 

A semi-transparent glowing white wall emerges in between Yixing and Jongdae. “Wow,” Jongdae cheers, amazed at the barrier. 

“This is called borderline. It’s to protect us from ayakashi and other things. Now, you try it.”

Filled with excitement, Jongdae gets in position and tries to mimic Yixing’s movement earlier. But before he manages to create anything, there is a knock on the door and he almost jumps. Yeri peeks into the room he and Yixing are in. “Yixing, Junmyeon hyung asks for you. He is in the main atrium.” 

“Oh sure, I'm coming.” Yixing dismisses the borderline he made and approaches the door. “Sorry Jongdae, let's continue this later.” Jongdae has no choice but to nod and let him go. Yixing smiles apologetically then follows Yeri out of the room. “What's the matter?”

“Bishamonten is here.”

Jongdae's ears perk up at the mention of another god, especially the god of warriors. When else will he be able to get a glimpse of another one of the seven lucky gods? Curiosity gets the better of Jongdae so he secretly tags along, hiding behind one of the pillars to observe. 

The main atrium is an open space in the front interior of the mansion, painted beige with marble floor surrounded by pillars. There is an imperial staircase that Junmyeon is standing on, still in all his glory despite only wearing a simple dress shirt. He walks down the stairs and greets a towering, sturdy man with flaming red hair. 

Jongdae guesses the other man must be Bishamonten. Like Junmyeon, Bishamonten is handsome and radiating godly charisma despite only wearing casual outfits – a simple black t-shirt, ripped khaki pants, and combat boots. His toned muscles are still apparent under his army green long field jacket. However, some bruises and cuts are apparent on his face and hands.

Jongdae can hear Junmyeon's worried voice. “Oh dear Chanyeol, what happened? Why are you all hurt like that?”

“I was ambushed by a flock of ayakashi during my stroll. And unfortunately, I was underprepared, only bringing Baekhyun with me.” Bishamonten, or Chanyeol, pulls out a silver handgun from his inner coat pocket, which looks pretty battered. “We got everything under control, don't worry. But he’s hurt. Can I ask Yixing to treat him? Sorry to bother you again. It sucks not to have a healer shinki.” 

“Sure, I can help,” Yixing offers. 

“Thank you.” Chanyeol flashes an appreciative smile to Junmyeon, then Yixing. “ _Return to form, Baekhyun._ ” 

A flash of light fills the room and the next moment after Jongdae blinks, a silver-haired boy is standing there, wearing a sleeveless hoodie and ripped jeans, with wounds all over his exposed skin. Yixing rushes out of the room and hurries back with some medical supplies. He lets Baekhyun lean on him, then carefully puts him down on one of the couches in the atrium.

So many things are happening, Jongdae itches to help or at least do something, to be useful to this situation. He slowly peeks from behind the pillar. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

His action unintentionally draws everyone’s attention in the room. Did he cross the line? Did he do something wrong? With so many eyes on him, Jongdae goes stiff, unsure how to go on from here and reduces the tension. Jongdae sees Yixing halting halfway and eyeing Junmyeon, asking non-verbally on what to do next.

The first person to react is Chanyeol. He tilts his head, observing Jongdae from top to bottom with curious, enthusiastic wide eyes. “Hmm, a new face. Is he a new shinki of yours?” 

“Yes. Oh, by the way, Yixing, please treat Baekhyun first.” Yixing nods upon hearing Junmyeon's request then continues attending to Baekhyun’s injuries.

“And Chanyeol, yes, this is my new shinki. Come here, Jongdae.” Jongdae’s heart flutters upon hearing Junmyeon call his name with such care and the way Junmyeon’s serene blue eyes gazes at him. His god is still as stunning as ever. 

Jongdae feels a bit shy but steps forward anyway. Chanyeol circles around Jongdae with his hand under his chin, inspecting the shinki. Jongdae’s heart pounds harder. He tries hard to stand still and be good to not embarrass Junmyeon. Suddenly, Chanyeol stops in his tracks and cocks his head towards the other god. “He looks to be in good shape, but why do you always bring Minseok around? Don’t you want a change of pace? What is his form?” 

Junmyeon’s reply is filled with hesitation. “That’s the thing. I’m not sure what he is.” 

“How so? Let me see.” 

Junmyeon calls, _“Come, Chen.”_

At last. Excitement sparks in Jongdae’s heart, replacing the nervousness from earlier. Warmth envelops his body in white light as he transforms upon the summon. A bronze pipe materializes on Junmyeon's hand and he shows it to Chanyeol. Although Jongdae is in vessel form right now, he can still hear and see what Junmyeon and the rest do. He can hear Junmyeon saying, “I’m still unsure what this is.” 

Chanyeol leans closer, inspecting the object in Junmyeon’s hand. He holds Junmyeon’s hand and moves it around to see the pipe from different angles. “I think he is a blowgun.”

“But usually a blowgun comes with the darts or the projectiles. But this one –,” Junmyeon runs his fingers on the smooth surface, “–nothing.” 

“Hmm.” Chanyeol scrunches his face in concentration, racking his brain for other ideas. Suddenly he blurts out, “Have you ever tried using him?” 

“No...I don’t know what he is, how do I use him?” Junmyeon argues, “I can’t open or uncap it. Too big and long to be a straw, too small to be a water pipe. But it’s hollow on both ends.”

“Did you try to hit it on something?” 

“No! He’s not a bat!” Junmyeon screams, truly horrified by what Chanyeol just said. He protectively brings the object closer to his chest, worried that Chanyeol will attempt to steal Jongdae away and use him to hit something or do something even worse. “And what if he breaks? I can’t kill him a second time!”

It’s Jongdae’s turn to be horrified. “What? I can die a second time?” 

“No no no, that’s not what I mean…” Junmyeon panics. He quickly pats the pipe gently while awkwardly whispering soothing words and reassurances, trying to calm down his terrified shinki before he becomes traumatized.

"Gosh, why so dramatic, I'm just joking!" Chanyeol laughs hard, clapping his hands. "Sorry, sorry."

Once Jongdae calms down, Junmyeon continues to share his concern with the other god. “And honestly, I’m kinda wary if I accidentally hurt someone. I’m not sure if he’s a weapon or not. This pipe reminds me of a human musical instrument – a flute or clarinet, I forgot what it’s called.”

“If it’s an instrument, you can ask Jongin,” Chanyeol suggests.

“Seriously? I don’t think I can face him again after…Sehun.” 

The room falls into an uncomfortable silence with tension thick in the air before Chanyeol breaks it. “Don’t worry. If you’re going, I will send him a message in advance.”

“You sure he won’t try to kill me the second I step my feet at his place?”

“I assure you he won’t. He’s fond of me,” Chanyeol pats Junmyeon’s shoulders to reassure him. 

“Uh, alright. _Return to form, Jongdae._ ”

In a flash, Jongdae is back in his human form but perplexed with many questions popping up in his mind. Who is Jongin? Who is Sehun? Why did Junmyeon’s voice sound so heavy when he mentioned Sehun earlier? What was the history between them? But before Jongdae voices it out, he pushes it back because Yixing has returned with Baekhyun. “Baekhyun is fine now, sir. Thankfully his wounds aren’t deep.”

And indeed, the shinki is now less pale and more patched up. A grateful smile blooms on Chanyeol's face. “Thank you, Yixing.”

“My pleasure, sir,” Yixing politely answers and smiles, flashing his dimples. He gestures to Chanyeol’s wounds. “Do you need any medical assistance?”

“Yes, please.”

Chanyeol rolls his sleeves up, following Yixing to the seating area. Seeing Baekhyun awkwardly moving around unsure of what to do, Chanyeol calls his shinki, “Oh, Baekhyun, while waiting for me, go talk to Jongdae. He’s Junmyeon’s new shinki.”

“Sure!” Baekhyun perks up upon the request. He approaches Jongdae with a wide rectangular grin on his face and stretches his right hand. “Hi, I’m Baekhyun.” 

Jongdae smiles back and shakes Baekhyun’s hand. “I’m Jongdae. Nice to meet you, Baekhyun.” Now that they are face to face like this, Jongdae realizes that they are about the same height. 

All of a sudden, Baekhyun leans so close to Jongdae’s personal space, studying Jongdae’s face with his droopy blue eyes. Not used to having this much attention, Jongdae lowers his head and rubs the back of his ears nervously, unsure what Baekhyun expects of him. Baekhyun coos and chuckles, “Cuteeee!” Jongdae whines and covers his face with his palms, his cheeks heating up in embarrassment and he has a sudden urge to hide. 

“Hey, don’t be shy,” Baekhyun giggles and pulls Jongdae’s hands away from his face. Jongdae is still shy, but the way Baekhyun is looking at him is warm with a twinkle in his eyes, it makes Jongdae feel less apprehensive about the other. It helps that Baekhyun is friendly. Jongdae gets the impression that Baekhyun is a touchy person because Baekhyun is sitting so close next to him, almost leaning into Jongdae, although the couch they are sitting on is wide.

“So…Jongdae. I heard you are new. Is it your first time as a shinki?” 

"Mm," Jongdae nods in agreement. “How about you?” 

"Uh, I never counted the days but I have been with Chanyeol for a long time," Baekhyun answers casually. "Anyway, I know a lot of things! If you have any questions, just ask me." Baekhyun's eyes shine with excitement, his energy reminds Jongdae of a puppy eager to play.

Jongdae decides to ask what was bothering him. "Earlier, Junmyeon hyung and God Chanyeol mentioned Jongin and Sehun… Who are they?"

Baekhyun starts, “So Jongin… I guess you know him as Benzaiten.” Jongdae nods, he recognizes Benzaiten as the god of art and beauty. 

“About Sehun…” Baekhyun pauses, carefully sneaks a peak to the side as if ensuring it is safe before he starts speaking in a softer voice. "He used to be Daikokuten's shinki before he transferred to Benzaiten." 

So there was a history. No wonder the atmosphere was so awkward earlier. Jongdae probably looks too flabbergasted after absorbing the news, because Baekhyun grins conspiratorially. “Well, our world is so small, so when there is something quite big happening, everyone will know about it. The whole thing happened during the gods’ summit. Whew. Oh, by the way, the gods' summit is a yearly event where all gods gather, feast, and share information. Sometimes if there are any important matters, they will discuss it at the summit. I think I never saw Benzaiten so smitten and Daikokuten so heartbroken. I still remember it as clearly as if it happened yesterday.”

To be honest, Jongdae is not sure how to respond to this piece of information. Is it appropriate to further gossip about this? But one thing catches his attention. "Transfer? You can do that? I thought that once a spirit becomes a god’s shinki, they are bound to serve him for eternity.” 

“Well, you’re right, but a transfer is possible,” Baekhyun explains. “You know how your name binds you to your god, right? So the god needs to release them of their old name before the spirit can be taken and named by another god. If the god doesn't release their name and they have another god naming them, they will have multiple names, multiple owners, and thus referred to as nora – strays,” Baekhyun shudders as if something cold has been poured on him, “You should stay away if you happen to see any nora. Don’t get involved with them.”

Jongdae feels that Baekhyun is uncomfortable talking about this nora matter, so he decides to change the topic, asking Baekhyun about his experience being a shinki of a god of war. Immediately, Baekhyun lights up, sharing his many adventures fighting ayakashi. Baekhyun explains that he transforms into a handgun with short to mid-range. He is one of Chanyeol’s favorite weapons. Because Baekhyun belongs to a god of warriors, they go out almost every day to fight. Sometimes Chanyeol only brings Baekhyun for patrol. At other times Chanyeol brings him along with other shinki fighting together as a team, alternating roles to attack. It seems exciting. Not to mention the way Baekhyun does his storytelling is entertaining with all his hand movements and various tonality, bringing up enthusiasm.

Deep down in his heart, Jongdae wants to experience the same thing. Junmyeon has given him a new chance in life so the least he can do is to be a useful shinki, to fight alongside his god too. But how can he be useful to his god if he doesn’t know what he is?

  
  


⭐

  
  


The night is pretty late but Junmyeon is still awake in his study, going through a mountain of paperwork and various wishes. All of a sudden, the back of his neck throbs. It’s not yet to a threatening level, but still, the sharp sting catches him by surprise and makes him wince. Although he has many shinki, he has an inkling of who caused it. 

It has been two months since Jongdae joined his household. Jongdae is less shy now, he talks more. And he is still so adorable, always smiling with his cute curly lips and always eager to help Junmyeon even in mundane tasks. But it’s the first time Junmyeon feels a sting from Jongdae. It’s fine, the god tries to calm himself. A young shinki can get too emotional, a little too worried, and anxious sometimes.

“Are you alright, hyung?” 

Junmyeon looks up from the paperwork on his desk to find Minseok in the room, staring at him with concern. The god puts on a smile, trying to act normal as if everything is alright. "It's nothing."

However, his smile doesn’t seem to convince Minseok. “I don’t think you’re alright. Tell me. Is it Jongdae?”

Junmyeon can’t lie to Minseok. Minseok knows him all too well from serving him for a long time. Since the god remains silent, Minseok approaches and takes a seat across the desk, leaning close. “I think you should do something about Jongdae. I understand not all shinki want to fight, but Jongdae is different. He may not express it and tries not to make a big fuss about it, but I feel he wants you to bring him outside. Maybe you should give him a chance?” 

Deep down Junmyeon wants to give it a try, but many considerations are holding him back. “But, what if the situation is too dangerous for him to handle? He is still so new.” 

Firstly, Junmyeon is hesitant because he is still unsure what kind of an object Jongdae is. Chanyeol’s input about Jongdae being a blowgun is helping, but Jongdae is still inexperienced and Junmyeon has yet to bring Jongdae to a real fight so he can’t help but worry. When using a new shinki, sometimes the god and the shinki are not synchronized with each other yet and unwanted things may happen. For example, the shinki lacks power so the ayakashi doesn't immediately get annihilated, or on the other hand, the shinki goes overboard, unintentionally destroying other things around. Those may happen.

“Ah, that look again. You always overthink. Stop that hyung, it’s not good.” Minseok pouts cutely before it is replaced by a curious look on his face. “Or is it about Sehun?”

The mention of his name has Junmyeon sighing heavily. "I can't help but worry, Minseok. You know our Shixun, ah well now he's Sehun, was one of my dearests. But not anymore." Although it has been some time, there's still that ache in his heart whenever he remembers his shinki that used to be so close and reliable, leaving him so easily just like that. "Maybe I was a bad owner."

Sometimes Junmyeon can't help but wonder, why did Sehun leave? Maybe Junmyeon unknowingly did something that offended him. Maybe Junmyeon didn't care for him enough. Maybe Junmyeon couldn't make him happy and satisfied despite what he has given. Maybe that's why Sehun left him for Jongin when the other god asked. All these regrets came and bite him, leaving him helpless. Despite all the powers he has, he couldn't even keep his shinki. 

When humans are in dire need, they call the gods for help. But when gods are in need, who helps them?

His train of thoughts is interrupted when all of a sudden Minseok wraps his arms around the god. Junmyeon wants to break off from the hug – he is strong, he doesn't need pity...but Minseok persists, pulling Junmyeon closer and running his hand over Junmyeon's head soothingly. In the end, Junmyeon gives up, puts his guard down, and lets Minseok comfort him. After all, Minseok has seen all his ups and downs. “Don't think that way, hyung. It's already in the past. Sehun was the one who chose to leave. Not everything is your fault.” 

"And besides, I don't think Jongdae will do the same thing. All shinki are different. I'm staying here, aren't I? Same with the others. And if anything, you can always bring me along for safekeeping.” 

Oh.

What Minseok said hits right where it should, Junmyeon admits he didn't think of it that way.

How can he forget?

He was too busy worrying, regretting, and getting stuck in the past while he has so many other shinki – those who stay, those who are still here for him through difficulties time and time again. It helps him feel better realizing he is never alone after all. 

“Thank you, Minseok.”

“Anytime, hyung.”

Now, is Junmyeon ready to open his heart and trust someone again? It will take time, but he has to try. 

  
  


⭐

  
  


After some time passes and he is still not being called by Junmyeon to go outside, Jongdae decides to live his daily life as usual. He recently discovered an interesting book so he has been spending the day reading in the library when Yixing calls for him. "Jongdae, there you are."

"Oh Yixing, what is it?"

"Junmyeon hyung is looking for you."

Jongdae almost drops his book. Junmyeon is looking for him? What? Why? 

His first reaction is to panic. "What happened to Junmyeon hyung? Did I do something wrong?" Jongdae has always wanted Junmyeon to bring him outside, but Jongdae is hesitant to say what he feels out loud so he has been repressing it. Has it gotten too much to the extent of hurting the god? Regret and anxiety start to fill his heart.

"Jongdae, Jongdae. Look at me." Yixing's gentle voice makes Jongdae tilt up and meet the other's eyes. "Don't worry. You aren't doing anything wrong. Junmyeon hyung wants to bring you outside." 

Jongdae's mouth gapes open. He can’t believe this. The god finally asked for him. Finally. 

When he meets Junmyeon in the main atrium, he can’t contain his excitement anymore. “Thank you go-h-hyung!!” He has the urge to wrap his arms around his god and so he does. Thankfully Junmyeon doesn't mind, he hugs Jongdae back and fondly ruffles his hair. 

"Ahaha, you're so cute. Let's head out!" 

The sun is still up in the sky when Junmyeon, Jongdae, and Minseok step out from the shrine and thread through the afternoon crowd. Jongdae's heart pounds faster and faster as they get nearer to their destination. Earlier Junmyeon didn’t brief him much, so Jongdae is unsure what to expect and what is expected of him. Minseok holds his hand and squeezes lightly, letting Jongdae know he is not alone in this. Jongdae is glad, but still, it doesn't do much to lessen the anxiety and rush of adrenaline in him.

Suddenly, Junmyeon stops walking. Jongdae and Minseok follow suit. "It's here," he warns, his hand gesturing to the building in front of them. 

Jongdae observes their surroundings with caution. It appears like a normal house in a luxurious housing complex, but he can sense something looming ominously. "What should I do?" 

"Well, just trust me." Junmyeon winks, a mysterious smile on his face. Jongdae gulps, his god looks so stunning like this. It is as if Jongdae's heart stops beating for a semi-second. But wait, he has a more dire matter in hand. 

_"Come, Chen."_

Jongdae feels a familiar sensation of warm light enveloping him, and in a flash, he shifts to his vessel form in Junmyeon's open palm. 

"I need you to focus," Jongdae can hear Junmyeon's calm voice directing him, "Did you see the smoke above the house?" 

"Yes."

"Do you think you can hit that?" 

Jongdae tries to gauge his surroundings and the distance between them and their target. It's not too far. His gut feeling says he should be able to hit it from this spot. "Yes, I think so." 

"Okay, I need you to help me. Chanyeol says you are a blowgun, yet you don't have any bullets with you. We gotta give it a try." 

Jongdae remembers his conversation with Baekhyun previously during Bishamonten’s visit. He once asked, "You are a gun right, do you have any bullets?"

Baekhyun shook his head. "It comes from here–" he pointed at his head, "– and him," he glanced at Chanyeol and gave Jongdae a knowing look. "I just channel his energy and let it out to where he wants to hit."

It’s one shot one chance. Nervousness starts to fill him up. What if he fails? What if he can’t hit the ayakashi and meet Junmyeon’s expectations? Jongdae forces himself to take a deep breath and calm himself. He can do this. He is not alone, he has Junmyeon. He puts his trust in his god fully. 

Jongdae tunes into Junmyeon, synchronizing with his godly energy. Being in vessel form, the connection between him and his god is stronger than ever. Jongdae can feel everything – from Junmyeon’s fingers on the body of his vessel form, Junmyeon's lips on his hole, and next, the blow of air from the mouth through his body. Using the advice from Baekhyun, Jongdae visualizes a bullet inside of him, letting the force of air and energy push the bullet outside through the other hole. To his surprise, a white bullet does come out from his pipe, lurching towards the smoke. But it disappears in thin air. 

He fails. It frustrates Jongdae, disappointment starts building inside of him for not managing to hit the target. "Hyung, I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Jongdae, it's your first time. I'll go a little closer." Junmyeon cheers him up and approaches the house. But before they manage to get in position in front of the house, a deafening roar can be heard. 

"Hyung, watch out!" Minseok warns them.

The smoke earlier is gone, replaced by an ayakashi in the form of an abnormally large grey rat perching on the top of the roof. It looks straight out of a nightmare with ugly horns on top of its head, the disfigured face, and the red eyes staring down on them, sending shivers down Jongdae’s spine. 

Wait a moment. If the ayakashi revealed itself, did they manage to hit and disturb the ayakashi earlier?

The rat ayakashi begins to move, crawling on the rooftop and flinging debris at them. Junmyeon instinctively shields both of them from the rubble with his arm and rushes to a more secure place. 

_“Come, Xiumin!”_ Junmyeon yells. The iron war fan appears on his hand. Junmyeon opens and swings it, sending a wave of powerful force against the debris. Some of the stones hit the rat ayakashi back. 

"Hyung, let Jongdae fight. Use him, not me," Minseok reminds the god. And since they are both in vessel form connected to Junmyeon, Jongdae can hear it too. Junmyeon agrees, keeping Minseok in his coat pocket and then gets Jongdae in position. 

"Jongdae, let's do it one more time." 

It is more difficult now since the target is moving, but Jongdae is determined to prove himself. When Jongdae feels the blow of air and energy going through his body, he visualizes a sturdier, sharper bullet and sends it out with all his might. The bullet goes further than their first attempt, immediately hitting the ayakashi on its shoulder. 

The rat ayakashi groans and growls in pain. Its screech intimidates Jongdae, but confidence starts to gather since he managed to hurt the ayakashi. "More, hyung!" he yells, and Junmyeon obliges. He aims, and together they fire another bullet, another, and another, piercing the rat ayakashi’s body until it is too injured to move. 

“Let’s finish it.” 

Junmyeon blesses Jongdae’s vessel form which glows white under his touch. He starts his chant, “ _In the land of abundance, there is no place for your defilement. I, Daikokuten, will destroy all evildoers and bad karma with my Chen–_ ” Junmyeon blows one last bullet before he says the final line, “ _– Be gone._ ”

Blinding light fills their vision as the rat ayakashi explodes and bursts into tiny particles. The remains of the ayakashi turn into a glowing rune, then disappear completely. 

“Return _to form, Jongdae, Minseok._ ”

Once he is back in his human form, Jongdae can barely stand. His knees are shaking so hard, strength leaving his body until he drops to the ground. He is still in a daze, not believing what just happened. 

"We did it, Jongdae." Jongdae tilts his head up to meet the god’s eyes. The god smiles warmly then kneels beside him and takes Jongdae in his arms. Jongdae is taken by surprise, not sure how to react. Warmth creeps up his cheeks, but at the same time, he appreciates the gesture. 

A mixture of emotions bubbles inside of him. Fear, because of the creepy ayakashi. Nervousness and shyness, after all, they are so close together. All of those mix with the excitement from working together, happiness because Junmyeon finally uses him, and relief because they have just beaten the ayakashi. Everything is so overwhelming, but Jongdae finds safety and warmth in Junmyeon’s chest. He presses his head and snuggles closer, inhaling the comfortable flowery scent coming from the god. Jongdae can sense Junmyeon’s hand patting the back of his head, and hears soothing words. 

“You did it.” 

Yes, indeed. He did it.

They did it.

At last, he can be useful to Junmyeon, his god. 

  
  


⭐

  
  


“You did a good job today.” 

“Thanks, hyung.” Jongdae preens under the praise, loving the head pats from the god. He and Junmyeon have just come back after fighting an ayakashi together. After so many times of fighting together, Jongdae no longer finds it daunting. Now he looks forward to going out and fighting, enjoying the adrenaline rush and excitement. Also, being used by the god is a very intimate experience to him that he treasures a lot. It is when he can connect the strongest with his god and be the most useful.

After dinner, they meet at the gazebo in the garden which has become a favorite spot of theirs to relax and just enjoy the night. “Are you tired, hyung? Want some massage?” Jongdae walks behind the bench the god is sitting on, then gently massages Junmyeon's shoulders. 

The god hums in satisfaction as Jongdae works through his tight muscles, lessening the tension. As Jongdae continues to massage and relax the stiffness away, Junmyeon can't help but reflect on their journey so far.

Out of all his shinki, Jongdae is the one that impressed him the most. He started shy, but eventually gained confidence. He is still young but eager, learning things quickly and working hard. As time passes, he becomes more and more efficient and proficient at fighting. He aims quickly and accurately, never misses, and finishes cleanly. It speaks volumes because a shinki's accuracy and strength are heavily reliant on their connection and trust with their god, so Jongdae must have absolute trust in him. Not to mention Jongdae often takes time to do errands and extra things for Junmyeon, like now. 

"Jongdae."

"Yes, hyung?"

"I appreciate you going the extra mile, but you don't have to do all of these things for me, you know? I know you are tired too from today." 

Jongdae's hands stop moving as if there is something in his mind. "There is something I have never said to you." He squeezes Junmyeon's shoulder lightly and slides his hands off, then walks around the chair and lowers his body to face the god. 

Jongdae stares directly into the god's eyes, speaking what has been hidden in his heart for a long time. "Junmyeon hyung, I’m forever thankful to you for giving me a second chance to live. I don't remember my past life and how I died, but I remember loneliness and pain. Then you took me in, gave me a name, an identity, and a new life. You gave me companions and friendship, you gave me a purpose. You did so much for me. So this is the least I can do to repay what you have done for me.” 

The heartfelt words reach Junmyeon. He can feel Jongdae's sincerity and is touched by his devotion. Junmyeon thought he did nothing special, yet Jongdae thinks so highly of it and appreciates him for it. This new perspective warms his heart and makes his eyes brimming with tears. Not wanting the other to notice, Junmyeon quickly averts his eyes and wipes it away before wrapping Jongdae in his arms. Oh, how fortunate Junmyeon is to have Jongdae. “Anytime, Jongdae. You’re my family, of course, I will do anything for you.” 

“And thank you for working so hard, my dear shinki.”

Jongdae looks up and smiles, his lips curl upwards and his eyes crinkle. A smile that is bright and blinding, the one Junmyeon wishes to cherish forever. “I will always work hard for you, hyung. I'm yours.”

“Aww, you’re cute.” Junmyeon coos, tousling Jongdae's hair, and lands a soft kiss on his forehead. Jongdae whines, but definitely not minding the affection.

After all, Jongdae belongs to Junmyeon. As long as Junmyeon wants him, Jongdae will always be here until the end of time. And he is glad to know that his god feels the same way.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!! Please leave kudos and comments~


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